The Bridge Studio in Halifax, Nova Scotia held it’s annual Holiday Party hosted by the owners Kathie Macnab and Balon Buckley. The afternoon is an individual game which starts the day off with a very social atmosphere. The evening is Stratified Pairs. Between the two bridge games there is a Pot-Luck dinner with overflowing tables of holiday fare. Games are played; Bridge Bingo, Bridge Match-up and everyone joins the fun. This year Kathie and Balon thought it would be fun to entertain the players with their rendition of “The Twelve Days of Christmas”. The singing voices were bad but the spirit was there for all to enjoy.

MY TWELVE DAYS OF DUPLICATE

On my first day of duplicate

My partner glared at me

And I swore I would never come back!

On my 2^nd day of duplicate

My partner bid 2 clubs,

Who the hell is Stayman.

And I swore I would never come back!

On my 3^rd day of duplicate

My partner watched me play

I had revoked

The director he was called

And I swore I would never come back!

On my 4^th day of duplicate

My partner bid 1 spade

I bid 2

Should’ve bid 4

Got a lousy score

And I swore I would never come back!

On my 5^th day of duplicate

My partner raised my suit

5 DIAMONDS!

I went down 2

3 No Trump is Cold

Another bottom board

And I swore I would never come back!

On my 6^th day of duplicate

My partner said to me

They led out of turn-

“DIRECTOR, PLEASE!”

Over he did come

This is what he said: “You can accept that lead and see dummy before playing a card from dummy. You can accept that lead and lay your hand down as dummy and let partner play the hand, You can not accept that lead and have it come from the correct hand in which case – You may forbid a lead of that suit or insist a lead of that suit and that card is placed back into the hand and played whenever OR you can request the lead from the correct hand and the card played becomes a penalty card and will be played at the first convenient opportunity.”

And I swore I would never come back!

On my 7^th day of duplicate

The opponents bid too much

We had them beat

I REVOKED

The director he was called

Gave back TWO tricks

They made the game

And I swore I would never come back!

On my 8^th day of duplicate

My partner bid 1 Spade

I bid 3

Then I heard him say-

FOUR NO TRUMP!

That sounded good

So I passed

He glared at me

And I swore I would never come back.

On my 9^th day of duplicate

My partner bid 3 No trump

I had to play it

Counted 9 tricks

Made only 7

OTHERS ALL MADE TEN

I lost my way

He glared at me

I glared at him

And I swore I would never be back

On my 10^th day of duplicate

My partner trumped my Ace

This was not good

Words were exchanged

They made five,

Gloating all the time

I felt bad

STILL FINISHED FOURTH

Forgot partners error

Thanked him for the game

Knew we had a chance

And I swore that I might be back.

On my 11^th day of duplicate

My partner overbid

He lost his way

Scored a bottom board

He’s such a boob

Tried his very best

The game was okay

WE ALMOST WON!

Knew we could have won

Partner made an error

I am not so bad

And I thought I MIGHT come back!

On my 12^th day of duplicate

My partner bid 6 No Trump

I had to play it

Counted 11 tricks

Made it on a Squeeze

Got a top board

I felt great

We finished First

CLUB CHAMPION!

Partner smiled at me

Others said “Well done!”

Joined ACBL

And I swore I would be back next week!!!